This third step could be part of soulful enrollment, but it also deserves its own platform.
What is Step 3?
Leaning into Foreplay.
When I started selling in both my fashion business and coaching business (and if I’m honest, this still happens), people were always interested in what I was doing, sewing, painting or hand-making, and selling, but that interest rarely, if ever converted into paying customers or clients.
I lost a lot of confidence in my ability to support me and my daughter with the money coming in from both businesses. Especially since I had gone ahead and quit my job before thoroughly thinking through how I was going to pay the bills after my savings ran out. I had no back up plan.
I was knee deep in debt (thanks to my crappy money mindset) and after investing all my savings into getting through my coach training programs, and other coaching certification programs, as well as financing my fashion business, I felt like I was in deep, deep ****.
Some people called me crazy or reckless or stupid. I trusted God and continued stepping out in faith. I hired my first coach and shifted so many stories (I can’t even tell you enough about the difference this made in my life), made it through my coach training programs and learned how to sell through serving.
You’re probably wondering how the whole Leaning into Foreplay thing fits into my sob story.
Here’s the deal.
Foreplay comes in when everyone loves the clothes, shoes, earrings or bags, but they’re not buying or sharing your stuff with their tribe.
Foreplay comes in when potential coaching clients enjoy all your free blog posts, free newsletters, free sample coaching or discovery sessions, and yet the FREE stuff is not converting – they are not hiring you as their coach (I did 50 free 2-hour sample sessions to 50 women before I actually got my first paying coaching client).
Foreplay comes in when potential clients are excited to learn how those essential oils are going to make them feel (they even grab a few samples), and they know all the benefits of your yoga techniques, but they still don’t invest in your yoga packages.
Foreplay comes in when your personal training classes are getting leaner, but the potential clients are not…. Because they’re not taking you up on your offers. They’d rather spend all day on Instagram looking at before and after pictures of their favorite influencers.
Leaning into Foreplay simply means holding space for your potential customers and clients.
Soulfully showing them what is possible for them when they buy your product/service or take you up on your offer to support them to their goal.
Leaning into foreplay is creating space for them to see what is predictable if they don’t lose the weight, let go of the anger, start that business, quit that job and create one that brings them joy, uncover their money stories and create wealth and abundance in life and business, get this new dress that’s going to have them asking, “where have you been all my life?” and empower them to embrace their feminine power, sexy vibe, confidence and self-esteem.
With my fashion business, I learned how to engage in complete foreplay with my customers. Supporting them to try on that dress in their mind (essential for online boutiques) by investing in my marketing, branding and photography. I changed the model and photos for my best-selling skirt and increased the price by 10X (it was worth more), and it went from selling 1 every three months to selling 57 between May 1 and July 31st of that year.
They loved the language in my sales copy that showed them what would be predictable if they didn’t buy it. Including a model and photos that made them go, “damn I want that,” and me being honest about whether or NOT this style would flatter their body figures based on the measurements they sent me (this was when I was knee deep in custom designs).
Learning into foreplay means been curious about what truly turns your clients and customers on to their boldest and deepest desires.
I nurtured them, got curious about why they wanted the custom skirt/earrings/bag or painting, what it would do for them, how it would make them feel and why me. The marketing made it easy for them to learn how it would fit in with what their current style or inspire them to go out and create a whole new wardrobe around it.
In my coaching business, I got my first premium clients once I stopped being on show. I owned my value. Owned my amazingness. Owned my gifts and didn’t have to put on an audition for any client.
I just held that space for them to see what was possible if they chose coaching (with me or any other coach), and what was predictable if they chose to do it alone. I went from needy, creepy, have to pay these bills to being of service.
Foreplay involves being really quiet, being present and tapping into my intuition to see if I even want to work with this person.
Foreplay involves determining whether the client is a great fit for you. Even three months is too long when someone is a pain in the ass.
Foreplay is a map of the journey from both the entrepreneur’s and the client’s perspectives.
A journey of Love + Curiosity + Service.
What about you? How will you lean into foreplay in your sales conversations this week?
I’d love to hear your thoughts on selling so that I can tailor my business coaching blog content to serve you better.
Next Up, Part 4.
Cheers to your fabulous Success!
I’m MiMi Dabo and I support Women Entrepreneurs who struggle with Creating Premium Clients and Charging their Worth, to Confidently Package, Price, Market and Sell their Services to their Ideal Clients in a Profitable Niche.
I help them to ditch the crappy Money Blocks and stories, and package their services into irresistible high-end offers for their ideal clients, raise their prices or charge what they’re worth, and market and sell with ease so they can radically increase their income – while changing the world in the process. Visit www.lifecoachforwomen.com.